Effective Methods to Build Resilience and Recover from Disappointing Setbacks
Unfortunately, no matter how much we try to avoid them, disappointing setbacks barge into our lives like an unannounced visitor. Personally, I find myself being dragged down when I feel as if FINALLY. everything is in place—but then … the Universe always has a way of keeping me humble.
Last month, I experienced a major setback. I'd broken the screen to my phone, which was an expensive unexpected expense that almost destroyed my mostly positive outlook (and stunted my writing mojo—hence, why it’s practically been a month since my last blog post).
Similar to quickly falling dominos, my negative perspective attracted one undesired event after another.
Because that's how life happens.
When we're in a great mood, we attract wonderful things into our lives. On the contrary, whenever we believe that we have an awful life—then that's what we attract: horrible events.
It's called The Law of Attraction (if you're unfamiliar with this concept, then Google it AFTER reading this).
Consequently, following my broken phone, I had business-related setbacks that I rather not share (because this isn't meant to be a rant, but a helpful blog post).
Like a chipped damn waiting to flood a nearby town, a few weeks ago, I'd experienced the final setback that mentally broke me to the point that I had to take the day off.
Unfortunately, when you work in direct sales, regardless of how kind you are or the superb quality of your customer service, there will always be people who rather hurt others than help them.
As an extremely sensitive empath, it's often difficult for me not to take other's actions personally. Thankfully, the following methods help me recover from disappointing setbacks:
1. Self-care.
It's easy to dwell and allow undesirable events to consume our minds with doubt that often festers into hate. However, making time to tend to our mind, body, and soul is the best defense against negativity.
When I find myself in a defeating situation, I do what makes me happy: listen to music while I primp and dress to impress, do the same to my littles, and then escape my environment. An example would be that a few weeks ago my littles and I had lunch and then enjoyed shopping with a family friend.
Just that simple shift in my schedule and environment allowed me to remove myself from what had reduced my usually upbeat outlook, as well as activated my resilience to overcome the undesirable setback.
2. Remember: Some people just suck.
As I mentioned above, you can be the nicest person in the Universe—but there will always be hateful trolls who want to drag you down.
Always.
Working in the direct-sales community has shown me just how awful people can be.
‘Cause chasing money without passion or direction often transforms people into thoughtless scum.
When I acknowledge that it's not me or something that I did or could have avoided, but that it's just another life lesson—all of those realizations are what I have found to quickly activate my resilience and redirect my attention so that I don't waste days/weeks/months/years ruminating (because it happened so many times in the past).
3. Focus on the good.
Whether you're self-employed or not, focusing on the good in your life is what will help you most during difficult situations. Allowing yourself to plummet into an endless spiral of doubt, hate, and regret will only attract more unwanted experiences.
In the past, when my anxiety conquered my mind, and I found myself falling into the darkness that was my depression, I had to quickly detach from the situation and remind myself that I have an adoring and healthy family that loves me. I have friends who care about me. Also, and most importantly, I make sure to acknowledge that it's just a bad moment—not a bad life.
Disappointing setbacks are an unfortunate aspect of life: we can't avoid them, because they just happen; nonetheless, how we react to them will either strengthen or destroy us. Therefore, we must face disappointments like a rubber ball—bounce back and keep moving!
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Krihstin Zink is a Texas-based wife, mama, product promoter and the bestselling author of Scarlet's Torment, Scarlet Unleashed, 3 Grams, Kate, and Scarlet Forever. When she's not adventuring with her family, or building her brand, she's concocting charismatic stories that keep her readers coming back for more. Her books and products are all available on her website. http://krihstinzink.wixsite.com/kzwrites
